Let’s do this. Let’s laugh more…with each other. And be more willing to laugh at ourselves. Life can feel so non-stop serious, can’t it? We have jobs, responsibilities, commitments, bills, meetings, appointments, family, etc. With all that we’re managing on any given day, we can forget to loosen up with a little laughter.

Did you know that laughing comes with health benefits, too? Laughter reduces blood pressure, blood sugar, and stress, burns calories, and boosts our immune system. Laughter makes our burdens feel lighter and helps us release anxiety and anger. And laughter is so contagious that it’s almost impossible NOT to catch the “bug” if you’re spending time with others who are laughing. The laughter I’m talking about here is positive laughter- the laughing that’s at no one’s expense. Because you and I both know laughter can also be used as a weapon.  So every day let’s be on the lookout for more humor. Let’s lighten up and laugh a lot more. Why? Because life is better and brighter when we’re laughing.  

Do you remember day dreaming as a kid? I could spend hours imagining all of the possibilities for my future. Sometimes, with age, we make less space for dreaming though. Have you put your dreams on the back burner? Have you tried telling yourself you don’t have time to dream or that your dreams no longer matter or aren’t even possible? Let’s do each other a favor and not quit our day dreams. In fact, make a point today of sharing with someone a dream you have for your future. We are never too old to dream a new dream.

To be an example. I love that this is a choice you and I get to make countless times every single day. That is, until I blow it, and require grace and forgiveness, because the personal example I set wasn’t anything I’d encourage anyone to replicate. It’s not fun being in this place, is it? But I’ve realized that it’s in this receiving of grace and forgiveness (from others and from God) that I’ve learned to more freely extend it. We are all leaders in any aspect of life we choose to be. Friends, family members, colleagues, and even acquaintances are watching us Knowing that our personal example is such a powerful leadership tool, allows us to approach situations differently. And it also helps us to reflect. We’re not going to handle every situation beautifully. We’re all human, right? We are going to completely blow it at times. But each one of us has the opportunity to learn from our mistakes and to keep choosing the personal example we want to set for others. Our words, actions, attitude, response, and reactions matter. And there is always the opportunity to receive forgiveness and grace and extend it generously to others.

It’s crazy how we can allow ourselves to get so consumed by what others think of us. A few (too many) times I’ve felt the need to show up ready to impress. I’ve given plenty of thought to questions I may need to field field from others and I’ve spent time rehearsing in my mind the successes I feel are worth sharing, carefully handpicking only those stories that will shine the best light on me. We can become so focused on looking and acting the part that there’s very little chance to make any sort real and lasting impact because we’ve made it all about us.  

You may or may not be willing to admit that this, too, is something you battle, but I’ve talked to enough people to know that I’m not the only one to walk this path. We try to look and act a certain way, say the right words, share the right stories, etc. And it’s all done in an effort to make it seem as if we have it all together/figured out and we don’t need help from ANYONE! We can wear ourselves pretty thin just thinking about how we’re going to pull off looking impressive. 

If your heart is to impact people and make a difference, your time and energy is best spent on just being yourself. It sounds so simple doesn’t it? But reality often proves otherwise. It requires you and I to get comfortable being vulnerable and transparent in sharing our failures, struggles, and shortcomings, knowing that this is what others can really resonate with.  

We’re all looking for encouragement and isn’t it interesting that we can give and receive it best when we’re willing to be real and to speak truth? It’s in the sharing of our “hard”- our failures and disappointments, NOT our successes, that we can offer each other such incredible hope and inspiration and make a significant impact. In doing so, we remind each other that no one is free from struggles and no matter what, things are going to be ok. We can endure adversity together by sharing our hurts and loving and praying for each other. More impacting and less trying to impress others for this girl. What about you?

Remaining so focused on the “closed doors” in our lives comes at a cost. There’s a pretty good chance we won’t see the doors that are being opened for us. Closed doors are ultra disappointing and down right discouraging. They often leave us feeling physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually spent. We’re usually beyond frustrated at the time the door closes and we’re typically left with many more questions than answers.. But it’s been my experience that the doors that have opened, well, let’s just say they’ve far exceeded any of my expectations.

I’m not sure how many more times I’ll need to relearn this lesson–God is NEVER late at opening doors. His timing is perfect so we must continue to put our trust in Him and wait. It’s not easy, but I’ve seen God’s impressive track record firsthand over and over again. His plans are always better than our plans. We don’t want to miss the doors being opened for us because we’re so caught up in our bitterness and disappointment about the closed doors.   He closes doors for reasons we may or may not ever fully understand or comprehend. But He does it for our good.

Are you stuck looking back at a closed door? What step can you take to let go of the closed door and look forward in anticipation of doors that are being opened for you? This holiday season, do you know someone who is struggling with a closed door? How can you encourage them?

I have such a love for the water and grew up boating on Lake Erie so I was naturally drawn to the book our life group has been reading the past few months called “If You Want to Walk on Water, You’ve Got to Get Out of the Boat” (John Ortberg). This book is full of truth and has reminded me over and over again how God is calling each of us to get out of the boat and trust him in every aspect of our lives. He’s looking for people to step up and step out on the water where it feels uncomfortable, even scary.  

You see, our faith doesn’t grow by staying in our comfort zone inside the boat. Each time you trust God and seek to discern and obey his calling on your life, your God will get bigger. You will understand more about his magnificent power, his unfailing love for you, his mercy, his grace, his forgiveness, his faithfulness, his heart, and so on. When we’re willing to get out of the boat and take a step in faith, we get to witness “But for God” or “If not for God moments.” It doesn’t mean that we’ll be spared from adversity, but we’ll gain a new and deeper understanding of who God is and all that he is capable of.

In the book, Ortberg suggests that the way that we live is a consequence of the size of our God. The problem for many of us (myself included) he shares, is that our God is too small. We’re not completely convinced that God is in control and that we are safe and secure no matter what. As a result, we tend to live with a lot of fear, worry, and anxiety because everything we do depends on us, instead of relying on the security and acceptance we have in God, who is all-knowing and has a plan and a purpose for each of our lives.  

What about you? What’s your boat? In other words, what are you clinging to and finding your safety and security in apart from God? What are you tempted to put your trust in? What are you most and fear of leaving behind if you step out in faith? Is it your job? The approval of others? Having enough financial resources? Fear of failure? No matter what it is that may be keeping you from getting out of the boat and walking on the water, know that God is waiting for you to take a step. He will be there to fill in the gaps. He wants you to fully trust him because your best life is waiting out on the water when you step outside of the boat. Every day, I’m challenging myself to get out of my boat and without my purpose. I hope you will too. God is looking for more people to join him out on the water, where we’ll see him get bigger and bigger.

As a parent, I want to remember this–children learn to make good decisions by making decisions, not by following directions. I think it’s easy to get caught up in wanting our kids to be “good.” We want them to behave, especially in public. And we tend to reward them BIG for following our directions. Don’t get me wrong. I’m not suggesting that following directions is a bad thing. But I do know that I also want my child to be able to make wise decisions. It’s important to ask ourselves if we are providing plenty of opportunities for our kids to practice good decision making. Because we know as adults how important decision making becomes. Our decisions impact us. They take us places and become our future.   

At times, it may seem as if it’s just easier to make the decisions for our kids. it would certainly take less time and energy . But when we do this over and over again, we miss countless chances for our children to grow in their decision making abilities. And I think we can start this at a younger age than perhaps you and I were given the opportunity to do. To begin with, it could be as simple as offering our kids choices at a very young age and walking them through the decision-making process for things that don’t have heavy consequences.

If you’re a parent, what are you doing to encourage your child to not just follow directions, but to also make good decisions? It’s never too late to take a step toward encouraging more decision making.

I want to be happy and I’m banking on it that you do, too. Even though this sign –“We tend to seek happiness when happiness is actually a choice.”—hangs in our living room as a daily reminder, I can still forget. It’s so easy for us to be deceived. We can spend a good part of our lives seeking happiness in all the wrong places. I’m guessing you’ve been there (or you may even be there right now). You’ve looked for someone or something to fill up that big hole inside you that feels completely empty. And in the short-term you may have met someone or purchased something that temporarily brought you happiness. But as the days, months, or even years passed by you started to realize that you put unrealistic expectations on that special someone or something to bring you happiness. 

Happiness is a choice we can make every day. I’m not going to tell you it’s always an easy choice, but we do get to choose. No matter what we’ve been through, what we’re currently going through, or what lies ahead, we have a choice. We can either let our past circumstances or current situations define us or refine us. We can let our challenges keep us down or propel us forward. Choosing happiness doesn’t means everything is perfect or that we don’t each have our own “hard.” Or even that we have to fake it until we make it (but I’m not totally opposed to this strategy to get me out of an emotional funk). We’re human so we’re going to experience a wide range of emotions depending on what we’re facing. We may be happy, mad, glad, sad, excited, angry, upbeat, depressed, mellow, relaxed, tired, energetic, etc. on any given day.  Choosing happiness rather than seeking happiness is more of a decision regarding the mindset we’re going to have as we approach our day in spite of everything that’s going on in our lives. If we go into the day with negative thoughts/feeling and we’re looking for someone or something to fill us up, we can’t expect to find happiness.  

 On the other hand, if we start our day by focusing on gratitude and our blessings, despite our “hard” we are choosing happiness. It’s not as simple as saying m, “I’m going to be happy today.” It’s actually something that needs to be recaptured by us every single day. It takes being deliberate and choosing to find happiness in the little things every day. And not waiting for happiness to be bestowed upon us by someone or something.

What about you? Do you seek happiness or choose happiness? If you tend to seek happiness, what steps can you take today to begin to choose it?

We get comfortable, don’t we? We are creatures of habit and routine. We eat dinner at the same restaurants. We shop at the same stores. We take the same route to work. And so on. 

Ass we get older it often becomes more difficult to think about change. Especially change as it relates to our behaviors and mindset, and the future we really desire. It’s important to do new things. If we keep doing the same things and those things aren’t working for us or serving us well, we can’t expect different results.  

What if choosing to do new things leads us to to our new favorite things? New experiences can lead to life changing opportunities. Doors can open to adventures we never dreamed possible if we plan, gather the necessary supplies, and set sail. It will not be risk free, but it will be worth it. Ships aren’t designed to sit in port. They are purpose built. And so are we!  We were made for so much more.

We live in a “right now” world. We want immediate results. We’re fans of instant gratification. We’re attracted to fast food, convenience, and anything that just takes one click of the mouse.

In fact, I don’t know anyone who is lining up to learn more about waiting and how to gain patience. We despise being put on hold, having to wait to see the doctor or checkout out at the store. And, let’s not forget the irritation of waiting on a train or being stuck in traffic. These examples reflect the sort of waiting that’s trivial and doesn’t necessarily keep us up at night.  So what about the other forms of waiting we encounter that are more challenging and often more serious and significant? Waiting for a job offer to do work your more passionate about. Waiting for a way to get out from underneath debt. Waiting for a meaningful relationship or marriage. Waiting for a healing from a broken relationship. Waiting for a child to complete your family. Or maybe you’re waiting on test results, a cure, a desire to live, a day where you are not judged or discriminated against. What if there is a plan and a purpose for our having to wait? What if God has something greater for each of us to gain in our waiting than frustration, worry, and anxiety?  

Waiting tends to be most difficult after we’ve stepped out in faith. We’ve taken action and we’re trusting God to show up and deliver only to discover that God often doesn’t operate at our pace. In the book, “If You Want to Walk on Water, You’ve Got to Get Out of the Boat,” author John Ortberg shares that waiting may be the hardest thing we are ever called to do in our lives. He explains that in the Bible, waiting is so closely tied to faith that the two words are often used interchangeably. So if God is all powerful, why does he make us wait? Because what God does in us while we wait is just as important as what it is we are waiting for.

We learn so many lessons in the waiting. We gain persistence, perseverance, and resilience. We grow in maturity and character. And we gain hope. Our faith strengthens and so does our trust. Ortberg makes an important point. Waiting isn’t just something we have to do while we’re in the process of getting closer to where we want to be. It’s a critical part of the process of becoming who God wants us to be. He goes on to explain that this form of waiting isn’t passive. Waiting on God is a daily decision to say “I will trust you and follow you. Even through my current circumstances are not anywhere close to where I want them to be right now, I am putting ALL of my trust and hope in you.” In many ways, it feels like a blind faith because we are putting our trust in what we cannot see. But we know that God sees things from a larger perspective and he is using all things and working them together for our good if we believe in him.  

Ortberg explains that all too often we want God’s resources, but we are not fans of his timing. In waiting, we must remain confident and expectant that God’s timing is perfect and that he knows what he is doing.  

The waiting really is the hardest part. It requires patience. I love Joyce Meyer’s definition of patience. She says, “patience is not the ability to wait, but how you act while you’re waiting.” We are called to patiently trust God in our waiting. We must put our confidence in him because we know that he is able. It’s important to recognize our own limitations. Ortberg shares that while we wait for something we learn to recognize that we are not in control. And we’re not just waiting around. We’re waiting on God. And we’re praying because prayer helps us to extinguish worry. And we know that God’s wisdom and his timing can be trusted.  

God honors our periods of waiting. He is in every detail of these difficult seasons we find ourselves in. So we keep putting one foot in front of the other knowing that whatever it is we’re waiting for is not more important than what happens to us while we’re waiting.  

How do you tend to respond to waiting? In what areas of your life is the waiting most difficult right now? What are some steps you can take to grow your patience?