Some days it can feel like a battle to remain positive, can’t it? Life throws us curve balls that create disruptions to our daily routine.

One of the books I’m reading right now is The Carpenter: A Story About the Greatest Success Strategies of All by Jon Gordon. It talks about the importance of learning to talk to ourselves rather than listen to ourselves. When we listen to ourselves we hear all of the negative thoughts, complaints, fears, worries, and doubts. But if we talk to ourselves we can feed ourselves with the words and encouragement to keep going, to keep moving forward. The author shared something he created called “The Positive Pledge” to keep close at hand for days when challenges come your way and you aren’t feeling very positive.  For me, reading, writing out, and even memorizing scriptures from the Bible has been an incredibly powerful way to stay positive through life’s storms. One thing I’ve learned about God’s word is that it never returns void. God is faithful and he is a promise keeper. His word changes our hearts and our perspectives.

What about you? Do you spend more time talking to yourself or listening to yourself? How do you remain positive in the midst of the challenges you encounter? Is there a step you can take today to begin talking to yourself more than listening to yourself?

Thank You.

Two small words.

Yet so much meaning.  

A holding tank for gratitude and appreciation.

A lesson we start teaching our kids at a very young age.

It goes a long, long way and it

never gets old and it’s never too late.

It feels good to say, great to hear, and incredible to receive.

Who has made a difference in your life? Take a few minutes today to simply and sincerely say “thank you.”

Today. It’s here. Right now. For you and for me. Did you wake up this morning thinking “What day is it? It is today. My favorite day.”?    
Well, my internal voice didn’t sound quite like that. It went something more like this– “I can’t believe it’s already time for my alarm to go off. Ugh, this head cold is getting to me. I’m sooooo tired. And it’s ONLY Thursday.”

You get the picture, right? Even though I love my job and have an incredible family and awesome friends and coworkers, there’s absolutely no part of me that woke up thinking that today is my favorite day. Instead, it already feels like one of those days where I’m going to be fighting it.  

But it kind of got me thinking. When you and I wake up secretly hoping it wasn’t today, we’re setting ourselves up to miss all the blessings in the day. My sense is that it would be quite a shift for many of us (myself included) to be a person who chooses to recognize the fact that each new day is truly a gift and a blessing and to seek what’s good out of the day no matter what situation or circumstances the day holds. It may sound far-fetched for some or like something to aspire to for others.  

My hope and prayer is that you and I would set our heats and minds on waking up and seeing the possibility in each of our “todays.” That we wouldn’t wait for special occasions or vacation weeks or the weekends to be our favorite days. That today we would find a favorite part of our day and give thanks. Because today is the present. It’s another 24-hour gift we’ve each been given. So let’s choose to spend it wisely rather than wishing it away. Are we going to get it “right” every day? No way. But let’s not strive for perfection. Just progress.  

When you got out of bed this morning, were you hoping it was a day you didn’t have to tackle your long list of to-do’s? Were you wishing it was the weekend or the start of your vacation? What if you and I started to live in such a way that we decided that today (no matter what day today is) is our favorite day? Or that we began to recognizing a favorite part of every day? Wouldn’t we make more of our days count?  

Each day there’s a small decision we must make. Are we going to let yesterday seep over and take up too much of today? Or are we going to let go of whatever tripped us up yesterday and say “yes” to THIS day.  

I don’t know about you, but I’ve let way too many yesterdays spoil the next day. And if I’m honest, I’ve allowed my yesterdays to spill over into the day after that and the week after that, and so on. It’s exhausting…mentally, emotionally, and physically, isn’t it? And you know what? It’s never once proven to produce a fresh perspective, positive attitude, new approach, or idea in my life. And its brought me zero joy or peace.  So why keep doing it when it doesn’t produce the results we’re looking for? Other than the fact that it’s just really challenging, and even seems nearly impossible, to let go at times, I really can’t think of one solid reason. I think it’s important to remind ourselves that it’s also extremely hard to keep holding onto bitterness, anger, resentment, and unforgiveness. So it’s up to us to choose our “hard.” We are stronger than we think we are. We can’t control everything that happens to us, but we do get to decide how we’re going to react/respond. And like most things in life, it’s a process. And we’re going to blow it from time to time. But we’re only one choice away from not letting yesterday take up too much of today. 

How many more yesterdays are you going to let take up or even spoil a brand new day? It IS possible to break the pattern. You and I can start as early as right now by choosing to say “yes” to this new day!

What if you woke up tomorrow with only the things you were grateful for yesterday? Ouch! Just saying, I would have very few things. What about you?

Even though I’ve been intentionally focusing on expressing more gratitude to God and to others, and taking note of a few things I’m grateful for every day, I know I still fall way short of having the radical attitude of gratitude that I’m seeking.  I want to show gratitude not just for the “things” God has given me, but for the people He has surrounded me with, the situations He has put me in, the adventures I’ve gotten to be part of, the unique gifts, talents, and personality he has wired me with and so on.  

I’m starting to understand that gratitude isn’t just about the wonderful blessings I’ve received. Sure, those are things I love and appreciate. But I’ve actually uncovered something about gratitude in the most unlikely of places. In the big and small challenges, setbacks, and detours you and I must face and overcome. It’s given gratitude a deeper meaning in my life. And in some ways, it’s actually opened up the floodgates to look at how much more I have to be grateful for with this broader and much wider perspective. If I’m honest, some of my most valuable learning experiences that I’m most grateful for have come from difficulties.

What about you? Are you someone with an attitude bent toward gratitude? Does your definition of gratitude encompass only the good, or do you also make space for giving thanks for the bad or the ugly because of how those circumstances have changed you? Maybe the obstacle you’ve faced has transformed your heart or your faith has been strengthened, or its reminded you of your need for God? What step can you take today to practice more gratitude?

P.S. I’ve already gotten to put this into practice this afternoon. I got a call from my son’s daycare that he had a fever and I needed to leave work to pick him up. My first thought was definitely not one of gratitude. But as I sit at home this afternoon with precious time to love and snuggle him, I’m grateful that I get to be his mama no matter what, whether he’s in good health or sick. ❤

Forgive. But how? And why would I ever do that? It actually seems like a complete impossibility to even begin to consider at times, doesn’t it? That person hurt me more than you could ever imagine. You don’t understand the situation. All of the circumstances and the pain.  

What God says about forgiveness is so different from our view of forgiveness. We tend to think of forgiveness as a sign of surrendering or excusing someone’s actions. If we forgive, we think it means we’re being asked to also forget.   We rarely see it as a sign of strength. But God sees it from a different perspective. He calls you and I to “bear with each other and forgive one another if any of us have a grievance against someone.” We are to forgive as God forgives us. The Bible also says that “In prayer there is a connection between what God does and what you do. You can’t get forgiveness from God, for instance, without also forgiving others. If you refuse to do your part, you cut yourself off from God’s part.” I don’t know about you, but I want God’s forgiveness. Actually, I NEED God’s forgiveness for my own mistakes. My part is to receive God’s forgiveness and then forgive others. God’s part is the portion we’re usually most excited about. It’s our part that usually gets us hung up.

I don’t know that there is any part of choosing to forgive that is easy, but in the end I’m learning that the process leads to peace. A peace I never knew truly existed when I was hanging on tightly to so much bitterness, anger, hurt, and resentment. You see, for a long time, I never quite understood that forgiveness isn’t about excusing the actions or behaviors of the person who has wronged us. It’s about our own healing and being set free. When we forgive we release ourselves from carrying a very heavy burden that was chipping away at and destroying our heart. Forgiving another person may never include an “I’m sorry” or any sort of apology from the person who hurt you. And that’s OK. It’s not about them. It’s about you. And God. And you’re choice to receive the gift of God’s amazing forgiveness for yourself. And, as a result, offer it to others.  

Grace, mercy, and forgiveness–these are words that have significant meaning, yet we can toss them around without realizing how much they can transform our own lives if we are willing to receive them from God first.  

What I’m realizing is that it’s in this receiving of God’s grace, mercy, and forgiveness where we grow a greater desire to give grace, mercy, and forgiveness away to others. God transforms our hearts when we accept these free gifts for ourselves first.  

I don’t know about you, but in the past I have been guilty of believing that God’s grace, mercy, and forgiveness are available in bulk supply for others and even remind them of this only to completely turn my back on receiving the unending supply God has for me.  

Grace is getting something you don’t deserve. And mercy is NOT getting what you do deserve. These gifts are so counter culture, aren’t they? I don’t know too many people who are standing in line to give away something to someone that they don’t deserve. And it’s certainly not our default button to extend mercy and ensure that someone doesn’t get what they do deserve.  

If we’re honest, I think we all struggle with both receiving from God and extending to others grace, mercy, and forgiveness. We may feel as though something we’ve done is too bad or a mistake we’ve made is too big for God’s grace. But that’s not the case! We may tell ourselves there’s no way we could extend these gifts to others, particularly those who have hurt us or those close to us so deeply.  

We have to remind ourselves of something we can be so quick to forget. Oh how I struggle with this one. God sets the standard as the giver of unending grace, mercy, and forgiveness. And in gratitude for these free gifts we’ve received from God, He changes our hearts to give these gifts more freely to others in return. Is it easy? I’m afraid not. Is it a process? You can count on it. But is it worth it? Absolutely! If you’ve never accepted God’s grace, mercy, and forgiveness for yourself, you have a choice to make that will forever change your life. I want to encourage you to take this step today.

What’s your excuse? You know, the thing you keep saying over and over to yourself when you think about pursuing a particular goal? When you and I keep feeding ourselves excuses we’re not setting ourselves up for any sort of progress.
Here’s two of my most popular excuses. I’ve said them over and over again for years. And frankly, I’m tired of letting these phrases stand in my way.

-I don’t have enough time.  

-I’m really busy and I don’t have the focus it would require to be “all in.”

What I’ve learned is that I can either make excuses that lead to zero progress and feeling like I’m stuck or I can make a plan and take small steps to see my goals/dreams come true. That means I have to do things that I may not “feel” like doing, but I know will be worth it. I have to say “no” to things I really want to say “yes” to. I have to “flip the switch” on my excuses and change up my internal voice.  

Here’s what this looks like in a practical sense when it comes to the excuses I’ve mentioned above.

-I don’t have enough time.  

The last time I checked, I have the same 24 hours in a day that others have who are crushing their goals. And so do you. We must choose to make good use of our time. With a plan, we can manage our time more wisely. We can use small pockets of time in our day to make progress.

-I’m really busy and I don’t have the focus it would require to be “all in.”

I’m as busy as I allow myself to be. And so are you. We must prioritize how we spend our time and make sure it aligns with our goals. We don’t have to be perfect to make progress. But we do need to plan for who it is we want to become. We have to be intentional about carving out space in our schedule.  

What are your most popular excuses for not going after whatever it is your heart desires? How can you “flip the switch” on those excuses and start taking small steps?

It’s crazy how tangled our thoughts can get, isn’t it? There’s just a lot whirling around in these brains of ours. And what we think, well, it truly has quite an impact on the way we feel, and the way we feel affects how we act. So we have to take the time to unravel our often tangled and twisted thinking because negative, destructive, and jumbled up thoughts don’t give birth to good, healthy feelings and positive actions.  

Sometimes we try to enter the process of changing the way we think on our own. We hide behind words like this that we tell ourselves or others…No one would understand.  

I’m fine.  

I’ve got this.  

I don’t need anyone’s help.  

I’m strong.  

I’ll ask for help if it really gets bad.

At other points, we may decide to enlist the help of close friends, family, colleagues, members of our church, etc. Some of us might choose to pray and, if we’re feeling brave enough, we may even invite others to join us in asking God for wisdom, clarity, and direction. Even though many of us have been raised to believe we should just be able to handle this untangling of our thoughts on our own, in many cases, we could also benefit from the insights of a professional counselor.  

My encouragement to you, well, to everyone really, is this. When your thoughts get more tangled than your headphones (Notice I didn’t say “IF your thoughts get more tangled than your headphones” because they will at some point or another), I hope you’ll choose to reach out. Share with someone. Be willing to be vulnerable. Take this step even if it scares you or makes you feel uncomfortable because you don’t have to live in silence fighting a battle with your own tangled thoughts.  

There is something so powerful and freeing about bringing your jacked up thoughts out into the light. In sharing with others and with God, the heavy burdens you’ve been carrying begins to lift. If you want to untangle your thoughts and improve the way you think, don’t go at it alone. There are plenty of people who would love to pray with you and for you, and walk along side you, and encourage you right where you are. They want to listen and tell you words like “Wow, me too. This is something I have struggled with or am currently battling.” It’s in this opening up and uncovering of the dark thoughts we’ve kept tucked inside that we realize that we are not alone. We get a glimpse at how we’re all fighting something and none of us really have it all figured out.  

Sometimes it’s going to feel like two steps forward and ten steps back because it’s a process. And the enemy wants you and I to believe we’re not enough and that we’ll never get through it. But we will! With the help we receive from each other and almighty God we will overcome. It’s worth it! You and I matter! We are loved more than we can imagine! And we don’t have to live another day trying to do it all on our own.

This is a question I’ve been asking myself a lot recently. If I don’t feel grateful for what I already have, what makes me think I’ll be happy with more? Deep down I know that I’m blessed and at certain times I’m pretty in tune with feeling and expressing gratitude, but if I’m honest, who I also am is someone who is challenged by a desire for more. More things, more money, more opportunity, more kids, more space/square footage, more adventures, more experiences, more time. And the list goes on and on. Can you relate? 

I want to be a woman with a radical attitude of gratitude.  Not just a girl who lets her feelings or circumstances on on any given day dictate whether or not she is going to be grateful. And this I know for sure. You and I have a choice to make. We can focus on all that we already have and the countless ways God has truly blessed us. Or we can zero in on the size of the gap we see between what we currently have and whatever it is on the ever-growing list of things we think we want/need. I know that “more” isn’t the precursor to happiness and joy. I’ve chased down too many things in my life only to realize that those very things I was running after with all my might left me unfulfilled and on empty once I got a hold of them. Anyone with me? We have to choose. But more importantly, we get to choose. It really is up to us. Recently I’ve taken a step. It’s a tiny step, but I’m already seeing significant results. I’ve chosen to start each morning by recognizing/naming at least three things I’m grateful for. And here’s what I’m discovering. Choosing to center my day on gratitude and all that God has provided for me is transforming not only my perspective, but also the posture of my heart. I’m starting to see myself as someone who is able to both give and receive to a greater degree. I’m learning that my capacity to give is actually based on my ability to receive with gratitude. It’s also made me reflect on areas of my life where I’m thankful that “less is more.” It’s helping me to see the beauty in everyday things that I’m pretty certain I was overlooking or simply taking for granted. And I trust that this is just the tip of the iceberg in my learning process about gratitude. I’m excited to see what else God teaches me as I continue my new morning routine.  

Do you ever struggle with feeling grateful for what you already have? Do you tell yourself the lie that you’ll be happy once your circumstances improve or to have a little more? Decide today that you’re no longer going to fall for it because it’s robbing you of the joy God wants you to experience today. And instead ask yourself this question. What blessings can I begin naming starting right now?