Author: Leslie Meyer

Passionate about helping people get on their mark so they can make their mark. Coaching, motivating, and encouraging others to pursue their personal and professional goals is what I enjoy most.
Being Present Always Beats Being Perfect

Being Present Always Beats Being Perfect

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Are you someone who battles with being a perfectionist? Or do you consider yourself a recovering perfectionist like me? If you answered “yes” to either of these questions, this quote’s for you. “Being present always beats being perfect.” Can I just get this tattooed on my forehead? You may be thinking, she just said she’s a recovering perfectionist. And you’re right, that’s exactly what I said. But for me, part of being in recovery is the need for nudging and reminding. I know better, but I don’t always choose to put it into practice and do better. So that tattoo idea seems pretty perfect.  

When I think about the people I consider most relatable, caring, genuine, and compassionate, they all tend to have this quality of being fully present. And they don’t seem to give a rip about trying to be perfect. What other people may think doesn’t even seem to be a blip on their radar. It’s incredible to see it unfold. When they are “there” they are all “there.” They are ready to tune in, actively listen, encourage, and share their own challenges and struggles. They aren’t distracted or thrown off course when everything doesn’t go according to plan. In fact, they seem to thrive in an environment where they’re not sure what’s going to happen next. And they have such a knack for being able to roll with it. If things get a little messy, they don’t seem to fret either.

We need people to be present in our lives and people need us to be present in theirs. Not perfect, just present. Showing up unafraid to be who we really are and reaching out. I know from my own experience the benefits of doing this, and my suspicion is that you do, too. Since that tattoo on my forehead probably isn’t realistic, can you and I just remind ourselves to do this more often? I hope you find yourself so surprised at how much people appreciate you being present that you decide to give perfection a much needed break. Move over perfection. Being present is where our best life happens.

Just Be Yourself

Just Be Yourself

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If I’m honest with myself I can struggle with this. To just be myself. I can remind a friend to do this much more easily than I care to remind myself. I don’t hang out in this space as much anymore because I’ve learned a few times too many that trying to be someone I’m not is mostly exhausting, largely unfulfilling, and very self-defeating,  

It sounds so simple, doesn’t it? Just be yourself. Yet we can make it so complicated. Sometimes just showing up and being ourselves is difficult enough, so why do we choose to put even more pressure on ourselves by trying to be someone we’re not? We think we may impress, wow, or attract someone by trying to be someone else. And yet deep down, I believe that authenticity is where real attraction lies. We can also fall prey to trying to live up to others’ expectations or the expectations we perceive others have of us. Beating ourselves up for not meeting or exceeding the often unrealistic expectations we place on ourselves can also entice us down the path of trying to be someone we’re not. Have you ever caught yourself wishing you were someone else, wondering what it would be like to be “him ” or “her” or anyone but “you?” Not proud to admit it, but been there, done that.  

We weren’t designed to be anyone else. We were actually created to be our own unique selves. And there’s a reason we’re each designed differently. What if we spent more time recognizing and utilizing our own unique strengths, skills interests, talents, personality, etc. instead of wishing we had someone else’s?  If this was the case, wouldn’t we all be living more in line with our full potential? I don’t know about you, but I want to make a difference in my life. And you and I can’t do that wasting time trying to be someone else. 

The Pursuit of Happiness

The Pursuit of Happiness

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I tend to forget this more times than I care to admit. The endless pursuit of getting more and hoping, or even believing, that those things will fill me up and bring me the joy and happiness I am so desperately seeking can actually leave me feeling so empty and unfulfilled. It’s not that more is bad. It’s just that when we think of more as a means to happiness it will rarely, if ever, meet our expectations. In the past, I have actually believed that things like a front load washer and dryer, stainless steel appliances, granite countertops, a new car, a new house (I could go on and on) would bring me happiness. Sure, they were nice things, but they didn’t result in any kind lasting joy and happiness. In recognizing and appreciating the things we do have, especially those things we have that money cannot buy, we are reminded of just how rich we are in what matters most in life. We get to choose. Are we going to focus on seeking happiness in the “getting” or in the “recognizing” and “appreciating?”

Keep the Faith

Keep the Faith

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I came across two quotes (authors unknown) this weekend that in many ways describe what it was like for Ben and I to pursue our dream of starting a family. 

The first….

“It’s not going to turn out the way you thought it would. It will be better.”

And the second…

 “Keep the faith. The most amazing things in life tend to happen right at the moment you were about to give up hope.”

Up to this point, we’ve chosen not to share specifically about Joe or our adoption journey on social media. There is a fear in putting our story out there that is difficult to put into words. In the past 24 hours we’ve decided that our faith is bigger than our fear and that sharing could bring others hope and encouragement in their own life challenges.  

Two years ago today, we received a phone call and within hours Joe entered our lives and changed them forever. We fell in love the second we laid eyes on him. We were his new foster parents and he was just three months old at the time.  

You see, for quite a while, we thought we were in control of our plan for our lives. We knew that we wanted to get married, buy a house, and eventually have kids when we decided we were ready. We saw others’ lives play out this way so why would it be an different for us?  After several miscarriages in my late 30’s though our world was rocked and we seriously started to question whether or not the dreams Ben and I had of having children would actually become a reality. 

We eventually decided to pursue adoption.  Coming to this decision was a journey in and of itself and involved a lot of letting go.  It was equally confusing to determine whether or not we should work with a private agency, an attorney, or children’s services.  I’m incredibly embarrassed to admit that there were times when I had thoughts that starting our family through adoption would somehow rob us of so much of what it meant to be parents. I couldn’t have been proven more wrong. In fact, what God has shown us in the last two years is that while things haven’t turned out the we planned with starting a family, the way things have unfolded is actually far greater than we could have ever dreamed or imagined. 

We adopted Joe on May 11, 2015, when he was nine months.  We are blessed, to say the least. And we are so thankful to so many people who walked with us through a time that was filled with uncertainty. We look at Joe every day as an example of God’s faithfulness. The joy he has brought to our marriage and our family is incredible. Joe has taught us to love bigger than we ever thought possible. Our faith has grown tremendously through this experience, too. There were times throughout the process to become foster parents when our hope tank was near empty and we were ready to go a different direction or give up on our dream completely. We’re so thankful that we hung on just a little longer to receive that call to pick up him up on October 17. And now we know that faith in God also includes faith in his timing. 

 Where do you feel your hope is slipping away? In what area of your life can you start trusting in God’s timing and believing that it will turn out better than you could possibly imagine? We want to encourage you to keep praying and pressing on in faith because God is in the business of working all things together for good.  

Me Too

Me Too

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We’ve all been “here” haven’t we.  In fact, some of us might be “here” right now. Unfortunately (or I might argue fortunately because of what you learn “here”), none of us get to escape being “here” sooner or later.  You know, it’s that place where we find ourselves head on with what appears to be something that wants to throw us way off course.

It’s a place that doesn’t discriminate.  Everyone gets their fair share “here.”It comes in so many different packages/forms, but it all includes some form of challenge or struggle.  Sometimes when we’re in this place it’s crystal clear for others to see and at other points it can seem invisible on the surface and make others believe we have the perfect life.  Even though we’re all wise enough to know that the perfect life doesn’t exist for any of us.  For some, it may come in the form of financial troubles where we lose a job, a house, a savings account, a retirement fund.  For others, it may be a devastating diagnosis or prognosis, a death of close friend or family member, a horrific event that leaves a community shaken.  Or a busted up relationships or a broken family and dreams, a miscarriage/infertility, or a tragic accident.  And so on.  Sometimes it can present itself as heavy emotions triggered by something in our past or even feelings we have that are  unrelated to any specific circumstance or event.

When we’re “here,” we can reach a point where we feel like no one’s been down the path we’re being asked to walk.  There’s pain down this road,  unanswered questions, fear, hopelessness, and uncertainty, the feeling that we are alone despite whether or not we have a strong support network.  It’s in this place called “here” that I’ve realized the comfort of these two simple words “me too.”  Maybe the person that says those words has walked a similar path.  Or perhaps they’ve walked a completely different path, but had similar thoughts and feelings to those that we’re experiencing.  When someone says, “me too” it can literally feel like a weight being lifted.  Another person who understands and has compassion for the difficult path we’re on.  A person who “gets it” and is willing to share with us how they are hanging on, getting by, seeking help, praying something through, pressing into their faith.  Who can you comfort and encourage today by simply saying “me too?”  We have no idea the ripple effect these two simple words can have on someone’s life.  And what a way to pay it forward if you’ve been “here” and these words have meant so much to you.

 

 

 

 

 

You Are Enough

You Are Enough

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You are enough.  Ok, read this again because my suspicion is that you may be struggling to really believe it. (I’m talking to myself right now, too.) You are enough!  You are NOT less than. It’s not uncommon to find ourselves seesawing back and forth between feeling that we’re NOT enough and believing that we ARE enough. Actually, I can bounce back-and-forth between this lie and this truth within minutes or even seconds. You are not less than. You are enough. You and I were uniquely created on purpose for a purpose. Believing that you are enough doesn’t mean you’re perfect or prideful or that you lack the need for any personal development, wisdom, support or assistance. It’s not synonymous with saying that you have it all figured out. It’s more about understanding that you and I are perfectly imperfect. And that that’s ok and that’s enough. Believing that we’re enough also helps us replace some of our deeply rooted and very limiting beliefs and eliminate our long list of excuses. Knowing that we’re enough and that we’re worth it allows us to stop acting out of fear and to start making choices and decisions that better support us in being all that we are capable of being. You are not an accident, a mishap, or a mistake. You are enough!