For me (and maybe for you, too) it seems pretty easy to walk through my life room by room, drawing up a list of work to be done and cracks to be patched. And while I have my own private and often unspoken list of a few personal flaws that could stand some fixing, I also tend to have no issues pointing out others’ faults. I’ll be to first to admit that it’s not very becoming. Our brains definitely seem to be trained to run on autopilot when it comes to being crystal clear about what we don’t want. But when it comes to articulating what it is we do want, well, it often gets a little foggy. 

What if you and I decided to balance out our list this year? What if we went about each day, not looking for flaws and all the ways we (and others) fall short, but for potential. Think about areas of your own life where untapped potential may be waiting to make its debut and shine. Also consider how you might encourage someone else to step up and share the unique gifts they’ve been concealing. And let’s make 2017 our best year yet!

I have dreams and my hunch is that you do, too. So what if we flipped the switch and stopped believing that “the struggle is real and we started believing “the dream is real? I don’t know about you, but I’d be all over a conversation with that lead in.  

It’s not that I think it’s struggle free, but it has to start somewhere, right? And I’m a firm believer that it begins with a shift in our thinking/mindset. Maybe you’ve started contemplating your New Year’s resolutions or perhaps, like me, you’ve made them so many times in the past and never stuck with them that it just sort of seems pointless.  

One thing I know for sure is that I want 2017 to be a year of dreaming more so I’ve decided to change it up a bit. I’m setting aside my oh too familiar list of resolutions and I’m getting more clear about my dreams. And I’d love for you to join me.  I want to stop playing it so safe and step out of my comfort zone because that’s where I know that you and I have the potential for so much more growth. I can find myself just gong through the motions, at times, where I just get lost in a daily list of my to do’s, and I can lose sight of what I’m moving toward personally and professionally. I’m going to commit to putting my dreams in writing and talking about them more. I want to start focusing more on all the possibilities instead of my lengthy list of all that seems impossible . I want my faith and hope to trump my fear. I want to embrace failure and learn from it because I know it’s part of the process. I want to look forward instead of backwards. I want to focus on what I can change not what I can’t. I want to pray more and worry less. I want to set aside distractions and spend more quality time with family and friends. I want my words to express more gratitude and less bad attitude. I want to be more thoughtful of others and be less preoccupied with myself. I want to lift people up rather than tear them down. I want to talk more with people than about people. I want to search out solutions rather than just complain about problems. I want to loosen my grip on some of the things I hold so tightly to, especially things like my free time and money. I want less stress and more peace. I want to focus more on the dream being real than the struggle being real. And for all of this to be possible, I need more of God and less of me.  

What about you? Do you have any plans or thoughts about starting the new year? Are you making New Year’s resolutions? Or is there a dream you’re ready to pursue or maybe reignite? Let’s make 2017 a year of believing that those big, crazy, exciting, wild, fantastic, amazing, and outrageous thoughts in our heads that get us so excited about our future, well, they’re a dream you and I have and the dream is real.

When I picked up the phone to make a reservation at a Hilton Hotel yesterday, I had no idea I was about to be reminded that one person really can make a difference. I know what you’re thinking. Who calls to make a hotel reservation when you can just book a room online? But I had a few questions that needed clarification so I felt like it was best to talk to a real person.  

We’re getting ready to head south for a family vacation for the holidays and we’re planning an overnight hotel stay where we’ll leave our car at the hotel and take a shuttle to the airport. When I dialed the 800 number, I was warmly greeted by a gentleman on the other end named James. From the moment he spoke, his voice put me at ease. He asked how he could best serve me and take care of my specific travel needs. And he did it so sincerely. When I inquired about the Park, Sleep, and Fly option, he shared that the package was available and that the rate included parking for 7 days. I asked about daily rate for the remainder of the time we’d be traveling and after looking into it he said, “In the past seven years, I’ve never seen anything like this.” The words came out of his mouth in such a way that I knew I didn’t just win the jackpot. He explained that parking at the hotel is limited and that the vehicle can only stay on the property for seven days. But he thought that sounded off base.After placing me on hold and speaking with his manager, he thanked me for my patience and let me know that while the hotel I inquired about wasn’t going to meet my needs he was working diligently to find me another excellent option. He found out that the hotel would indeed tow our car. He said, “I can’t believe it.” He acknowledged that he thought that wasn’t right. He said, “Leslie, when I pick up the phone, I just want you to know that I do so as your advocate. So right now, I want to do whatever I can to ensure you have the best possible experience. Who says this, right? Especially in such a sincere and genuine way that you believe it will be done.

James did indeed come through on his promise. He found another Hilton-owned property just a few miles away that was a little less money and included parking for the entire time we’ll be away. He went on to explain that the room was actually an upgrade from the room that was available to us at the property we originally called about.” He gave me the address of the property and had no problem allowing me a few minutes to research it online while we were still on the phone to ensure that it met/exceeded my expectations.  

While I briefly conducted my online investigation of the hotel, James shared a little bit about his background and the many years he spent in a management role in corporate America. He shared that his job required him to travel and that he had stayed in more hotels than anyone ever should. He told me about how he believes in the Hilton brand and the company’s mission and his job is to provide the highest quality customer experience and get to know the people he’s assisting so that he can best meet their needs. I said, “James, you should be teaching this stuff. Why aren’t you a corporate trainer?” He shared that he’s a Christian and the most important thing to him is to be wherever God wants him to be. And he feels that his position with the Hilton is exactly where God’s called him right now. He went on to explain that he feels it’s important to take time to “visit” in an effort to learn about his customers so that he can make a real connection with them. He shared that he’s fortunate to have a manager who agrees with his philosophy.  

James is a rock star at his job! Don’t worry. I told him that, too. If I owned my own company, I would want James working with me. He’s a leader without the leadership title and he left such a lasting impact on me. He ended the call by wishing me and my family a blessed and Merry Christmas and he told me to go out and do great things. I’m so thankful for James’ reminder of what we can all forget. I am only one person. And you are only one person. We cannot do everything, but we can do something . So let’s not refuse to do something we can do. And we’ll change the world!

P.S. After the call, I looked up the mission, vision and values of the Hilton, which, by the way, is something I’ve never done after talking with a customer services representative from any other company. And sure enough, it was no surprise that James embodies all of it! He’s so proud to be representing a company he believes in.
Hilton’s Vision
• To fill the earth with the light and warmth of hospitality- by delivering an exceptional experience- every hotel, every guest, every time.  

Hilton’s Mission:
• To be the most hospitable company in the world- by creating heartfelt experiences for guests, meaningful opportunities for team members…

Hilton’s Values:
Hospitality- We’re passionate about delivering exceptional customer experiences.

Integrity- We do the right thing, all the time.

Leadership- We’re leaders in our industry and our communities.

Teamwork- We’re team players in everything we do.

Ownership- We’re the owners of our actions and our decisions.

Now- We operate with a sense of urgency and discipline.

Doing things out of love feels good, doesn’t it? When our hearts are in the right place the follow through seems like a breeze. It’s when we agree to do something we’re less than thrilled about or say “yes” to a few too many things that we find ourselves at our tipping point. How did this happen again? The incredible opportunity we had to serve others and show and share big love is lost when we say “yes” to too much or show up with our heart in the wrong place.

What are the warning signs that you’ve reached this point? You’re overly stressed. Under your breath you say things like, “I’m just really busy. I don’t have time for this. I don’t want to go. These people don’t even appreciate what we’re doing. Next time, I’m just not even going to ________ (fill in the blank).” Or worse yet, you vocalize your frustration to anyone and everyone in your path who will listen. You’re mentally, emotionally, and physically drained before you even step foot out the door. You show up, but at the same time you check out. You’re “there” but not really “there.” Your mind is focused on a hundred or so other things you’d rather be doing than what you just showed up to do. You can’t wait until the event, get together, project, etc. is over because you’ve now made it something to endure instead of something to enjoy. And when it’s all said and done you’re absolutely exhausted and wiped out.

If you and I want to make an impact, if we really want to make a difference in the lives of others, we need to do a heart check. Are we saying “yes” because we suffer from the disease to please everyone? As a recovering “people pleaser” myself, I can’t even begin to count how many times I’ve said “yes” and showed up to carry out my good intentions with my heart in the wrong place. Or are we saying “yes” out of a place of genuine love in our hearts, where it feels rewarding and so worth every ounce of effort we’re putting forth that we’d never question doing it any differently? 

We’re human, right? So how do we do everything with so much love in our hearts that we’d never want to do it any other way? And what about those times when we do things, not because they’re things WE WANT to do, but things we or others feel WE NEED to do or have to do? I know for certain that we can’t go at it alone. First, we must be willing to ask God to fill in the gaps, to direct our steps, to open, soften, and change our hearts, to help us prioritize our “yeses” so that we don’t overcommit. Sometimes we need to make the decision not to engage in negative commentary about the situation. That means you and I agree in advance not to state the obvious to our friend, family member, or colleague about what we have to do (or just got done doing) that we’re less than ok with because we already know that these conversations never, ever lead to a good place. I’ve seen this play out countless times in my own life, especially in marriage. Before Ben and I know it, in the sharing of our intense frustration about a situation we’ve said “yes” to, we often end up at odds with each other. And in the end, we’re in a heated conversation about things we can’t significantly impact or change. Instead, we must choose to control what we can, which is our own attitude and actions, and let go of what we can’t. Easier said than done, but so worth it, I promise!  

And when we fall short, because we definitely will at times, we just need to seek God for the forgiveness, grace, and mercy. He’s waiting to provide an abundant and never ending supply of it to each of us.

Are you ready for a heart check? What can you do today that comes from a place of love? Pay attention to how you feel when you do it all with love in your heart and I suspect, like me, you’ll want to do it again and again because it makes you and others feel so good.  

Hands-down this is my new favorite hat! A Christmas gift to me from me. Can we just admit that when we’re buying gifts it’s kind of fun to slip one in for ourselves every now and then?
So why wear a hat with “Bless this mess” plastered front and center? What I love most is the simple truth of the embroidered message. You see, I’m a mess. And you know what? I’m just going to put it out there and say that you, well, you’re kind of a mess, too. You might just do a better job of hiding it. At least for a little while. Here’s the deal. We’re all a bunch of messed up people. And the sooner we’re able to come to grips with this, the better off we’ll be.  

In our willingness to share our messes with others we start to see that we each have our own set of challenges, problems, obstacles, and issues. We don’t feel so alone. And we can encourage each other, provide hope, and point people to resources when we’re willing to be real with each other about our mess. As we manage our way in, through, around, and out of our messes, we can help each other uncover messages and lessons hidden in our messes, too. And we can point people to God, who can make our greatest messes seem so much more manageable.

I love watching how God takes my mess and your mess and, like an artist, He creates a one-of-a-kind masterpiece. God is a redeemer. And none of it is wasted. Each of our messes becomes a part of our unique story. And our stories matter. We are a beautifully broken mess. Faith, character, patience, peace, forgiveness, grace, mercy, love, compassion, empathy, kindness, and so much more grow out of our messes. There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t ask God to bless this mess. And I’m asking him to bless your mess, too. Sometimes it’s a simple prayer…”Please God, I want more of you and less of me.” 

 What about you? Do you realize that you are a beautifully broken mess? Are you asking God to intervene in your mess? Are you praying that he’ll reveal himself in a big way in a friend or family member’s mess? Who can you encourage today by being a little bit more vulnerable in sharing your mess? Is there a message or lesson you’ve recently uncovered in your mess that someone you know could benefit from if you were willing to share?

Let’s do this. Let’s laugh more…with each other. And be more willing to laugh at ourselves. Life can feel so non-stop serious, can’t it? We have jobs, responsibilities, commitments, bills, meetings, appointments, family, etc. With all that we’re managing on any given day, we can forget to loosen up with a little laughter.

Did you know that laughing comes with health benefits, too? Laughter reduces blood pressure, blood sugar, and stress, burns calories, and boosts our immune system. Laughter makes our burdens feel lighter and helps us release anxiety and anger. And laughter is so contagious that it’s almost impossible NOT to catch the “bug” if you’re spending time with others who are laughing. The laughter I’m talking about here is positive laughter- the laughing that’s at no one’s expense. Because you and I both know laughter can also be used as a weapon.  So every day let’s be on the lookout for more humor. Let’s lighten up and laugh a lot more. Why? Because life is better and brighter when we’re laughing.  

Do you remember day dreaming as a kid? I could spend hours imagining all of the possibilities for my future. Sometimes, with age, we make less space for dreaming though. Have you put your dreams on the back burner? Have you tried telling yourself you don’t have time to dream or that your dreams no longer matter or aren’t even possible? Let’s do each other a favor and not quit our day dreams. In fact, make a point today of sharing with someone a dream you have for your future. We are never too old to dream a new dream.

To be an example. I love that this is a choice you and I get to make countless times every single day. That is, until I blow it, and require grace and forgiveness, because the personal example I set wasn’t anything I’d encourage anyone to replicate. It’s not fun being in this place, is it? But I’ve realized that it’s in this receiving of grace and forgiveness (from others and from God) that I’ve learned to more freely extend it. We are all leaders in any aspect of life we choose to be. Friends, family members, colleagues, and even acquaintances are watching us Knowing that our personal example is such a powerful leadership tool, allows us to approach situations differently. And it also helps us to reflect. We’re not going to handle every situation beautifully. We’re all human, right? We are going to completely blow it at times. But each one of us has the opportunity to learn from our mistakes and to keep choosing the personal example we want to set for others. Our words, actions, attitude, response, and reactions matter. And there is always the opportunity to receive forgiveness and grace and extend it generously to others.

It’s crazy how we can allow ourselves to get so consumed by what others think of us. A few (too many) times I’ve felt the need to show up ready to impress. I’ve given plenty of thought to questions I may need to field field from others and I’ve spent time rehearsing in my mind the successes I feel are worth sharing, carefully handpicking only those stories that will shine the best light on me. We can become so focused on looking and acting the part that there’s very little chance to make any sort real and lasting impact because we’ve made it all about us.  

You may or may not be willing to admit that this, too, is something you battle, but I’ve talked to enough people to know that I’m not the only one to walk this path. We try to look and act a certain way, say the right words, share the right stories, etc. And it’s all done in an effort to make it seem as if we have it all together/figured out and we don’t need help from ANYONE! We can wear ourselves pretty thin just thinking about how we’re going to pull off looking impressive. 

If your heart is to impact people and make a difference, your time and energy is best spent on just being yourself. It sounds so simple doesn’t it? But reality often proves otherwise. It requires you and I to get comfortable being vulnerable and transparent in sharing our failures, struggles, and shortcomings, knowing that this is what others can really resonate with.  

We’re all looking for encouragement and isn’t it interesting that we can give and receive it best when we’re willing to be real and to speak truth? It’s in the sharing of our “hard”- our failures and disappointments, NOT our successes, that we can offer each other such incredible hope and inspiration and make a significant impact. In doing so, we remind each other that no one is free from struggles and no matter what, things are going to be ok. We can endure adversity together by sharing our hurts and loving and praying for each other. More impacting and less trying to impress others for this girl. What about you?

Remaining so focused on the “closed doors” in our lives comes at a cost. There’s a pretty good chance we won’t see the doors that are being opened for us. Closed doors are ultra disappointing and down right discouraging. They often leave us feeling physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually spent. We’re usually beyond frustrated at the time the door closes and we’re typically left with many more questions than answers.. But it’s been my experience that the doors that have opened, well, let’s just say they’ve far exceeded any of my expectations.

I’m not sure how many more times I’ll need to relearn this lesson–God is NEVER late at opening doors. His timing is perfect so we must continue to put our trust in Him and wait. It’s not easy, but I’ve seen God’s impressive track record firsthand over and over again. His plans are always better than our plans. We don’t want to miss the doors being opened for us because we’re so caught up in our bitterness and disappointment about the closed doors.   He closes doors for reasons we may or may not ever fully understand or comprehend. But He does it for our good.

Are you stuck looking back at a closed door? What step can you take to let go of the closed door and look forward in anticipation of doors that are being opened for you? This holiday season, do you know someone who is struggling with a closed door? How can you encourage them?