What if…?  This question can consume us, can’t it?  It can literally stop us in our tracks and paralyze us in fear.  It can be a dream crusher and a hope buster. And it’s a fairly common question that comes up as we consider BIG decisions in our lives.

In this election season alone, I would bet that many of us have asked ourselves this question more often than we care to admit.  I know I have.  When we’re faced with a decision, we can “what if” it to death.  And it’s interesting that what follows the “what if” usually has a negative spin to it.  What if Hillary Clinton becomes president?  What if Donald Trump is elected into office?    And each side says, “Can you imagine, he’ll….or she’ll…?”  You can watch the news, listen to the radio, pick up your phone, or log onto your computer and hear peoples’ opinions on who you should vote for and countless speculations on what will or will not happen if that particular candidate is elected.

We don’t know yet what the outcome of this presidential election will be and with one day left before we get a clearer sense of the results, I wanted to share something that I heard this weekend that I felt was worth sharing.  Our pastor’s message reminded me of what to keep top of mind when we’re facing difficult choices or decisions and we’re overwhelmed with “What if…” questions.

Living our lives in fear of what is to come is not a good look.  So what do we do?  If we call ourselves Christians, we must remember who Jesus is.  We have to think about the names for God.  And in doing so, find courage and hope.  It’s difficult to grasp because we tend to change like the wind.  On the other hand, Jesus is unchanging.  He is the same yesterday, today, and forever.  He is…

• God
• All powerful
• All knowing
• Almighty
• King of kings
• Lord of lords
• Our rescuer
• Our protector
• The beginning and the end
• The alpha and the omega
• Counselor
• Father of all
• Deliverer
• The Most High over all of the Earth
• Redeemer
• The Light
• The Holy One
• Messiah (The Chosen One)
• Light of the World
• Savior
• The Rock
• Good Shepard
• Everlasting
• Creator of the heavens and the earth
• The initiator and sustainer of our faith
• Immanuel (God is with us.)

The list of names for Jesus goes on and on.  It’s critical for you and I to remind ourselves that God is there.  In ever detail.  In every situation.   He’s present right there in the midst of our “What if…?” questions so we don’t need to fear.  This week, God already knows who’s going to be the next president of the United States and he wants you and I to know that it’s going to be ok.  Not because of who’s elected, but because of who he is.  And whose we are.  As sons and daughters of Christ, he is with us no matter what the outcome.  And not just with the presidential election, but with anything and everything we face.

So “what if” we asked ourselves these questions starting right now?  “What if” we really believed that God is who he says he is?  How could you and I begin to live differently?  What would we begin pursuing if we really started to own this?  What would we move  toward in faith instead of shy away from in fear?  “What if” we took time to reflect back and see how faithful God has been in the bible, in others’ lives, and in our own lives?  Let’s challenge ourselves to start ending our “what if” questions on a positive note.  And in doing so, “what if” we became a little more confident, more hopeful, more brave, more trusting, more calm, more assured, and more encouraged about our future?

 

 

An awesome friend and colleague shared this image with me. When we ask someone how they are doing, we often get this answer- “I’m fine.” Be mindful that there is often a lot more going on beneath the surface of the word “fine.” We know this to be true for ourselves, but we don’t always extend that grace to others.

P. S. I posted this on Facebook recently, but I know some of you aren’t using Facebook so I wanted to share it here.

My two-year-old son, Joe, has a few favorite words right now. It will come as little surprise to most of you that topping off the list are “no” or “NO, NO, NO” if he really wants to get his point across and “mine.” Just recently though,  he’s learned a new phrase to say, “I’m stuck!” He echoes this repeatedly when he’s anywhere he wants to be removed from- his highchair, his crib, or his car seat- just to name a few. By saying “I’m stuck” he’s making his needs known and learned pretty quickly that help is on the way.

This got me thinking. At what point are we taught that it’s not a good idea to verbalize our need for help anymore? As we get older we are more inclined to stuff our “I’m stuck” deep down below the surface and try to appear as though we have it all together.  We start to believe that nobody feels “stuck” like we do. We think everyone is moving on with their lives and we’re “stuck” in this hole we can’t get out of. We may start to believe that most of the people we are surrounded by don’t have any real issues or problems.  We tell ourselves they have no idea what it’s like to be my kind of “stuck.”  We know that’s a lie, but we  convince ourselves otherwise.

In the process of burying where we’re “stuck,” we set ourselves up to miss out on all of the support that’s available to us. We close ourselves off from the love and encouragement of friends, family, colleagues, pastors, counselors, therapist, coaches, mentors, etc. We don’t allow others the opportunity to speak truth into our lives, pray for us, and point us back to our faith, beliefs, values, purpose, etc. By choosing to bottle up our “I’m stuck” we turn our backs on this help and hope we so desperately desire and need.

When we stop sharing where we’re “stuck,” we tend to put ourselves on an island where we feel there is little to no hope and we may begin believing lies like we don’t matter and that no one cares. As the years pass by, the idea of saying that we’re “stuck”and asking for help is something we can start to identify as a sign weakness, while in reality this couldn’t be further from the truth. It’s actually the point at which we can draw so much strength.  

I’m not sure what your belief system is, but in my own life I can tell you this.   I have begged and pleaded with God and asked him to remove me from situations or circumstances when I’ve felt “stuck.” And what I’ve learned is that God has the ability to deliver us FROM our challenges or take us THROUGH our challenges.  I’ve had more experience with the latter though and found that some of my most valuable life lessons have come from God delivering me THROUGH rather than FROM my “I’m stuck.”  No matter what, I think God wants us to know that there is always a way to get unstuck. To get back on track. And looking back I honestly can’t think of a time when I got unstuck alone. I think that’s by design, too. God’s desire is for us to seek him and each other when we’re “stuck.” We are supposed to be in community with one another, sharing and loving each other through the good and the bad. Speaking truth and encouraging each other to take next steps in the places where we’re “stuck.”

I don’t think there are too many peoplle who don’t feel “stuck” in some area of their life.  Or maybe it’s not that they feel “stuck” in a situation, but rather a pattern of thinking or a negative mindset. So this question still remains top of mind-What real benefits lie in hiding our “I’m stuck” from each other?  Who is it really helping?  

I’m so thankful for this @I’m stuck” reminder that came about from my toddler’s new favorite words bank.  He is modeling for me the best path to take.  So the next time I’m in a difficult place, yep, you’re going to hear me say it, “I’m stuck.”

What step can you take? Are you willing to challenge yourself to share with someone where your stuck?  Could you reach out to a friend, family member or colleague and encourage them in an area where they feel stuck?   Do you have encouragement to offer about what you do when your stuck?  If so, I hope you’ll share by posting a comment.

WARNING: This post may help you overcome your fears and accomplish more of your goals. I don’t know about you, but when it comes to goal setting I’ve been taught to set goals that are SMART-Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Timely. While this method has proved to be helpful in forming my goals over the years, it puts all of the focus on WHAT we’re going to do to achieve our goals and HOW we’re going to do it.  

The piece that’s missing is the “WHY.” Has anyone asked you, “What’s your why?” Or more importantly, have you ever asked yourself the question? What are your reasons for wanting to accomplish your goals in the first place? Your “why” is bigger than your “what” or “how.” Getting clear about your “why” has a significant impact on your overall success. I so wish someone would’ve shared this with me when I was younger. Your “why” helps you cast a vision for your future and it’s the motivating and driving force for going after what you want most in your life.    

I’ve set enough goals in my life (and I’m assuming you have, too) to know how easy it is to get stuck in the “what” and the “how.” You know the conversation. I’m going to do this, this and definitely this and here is exactly how I’m going to do it. So how do we get ourselves unstuck or better yet just avoid getting stuck altogether?  We start by thinking about and writing down our “why” and we let our “why” lead us in everything we do. (Side note: It’s OK if your “why”scares you, pulls at your heart strings, or makes you a little emotional. It should.). We then develop what we’re going to do and how we’re going to do it from our “why.” We review our “why” whenever we’re frustrated or discouraged, or experiencing a road block or setback. And we must remember that our goals don’t equal our happiness. They’re the actions or steps (the “what” and the “how”) we’re going to take on the path to living out our “why.”